All's Fair In Love and War: A Harry Potter OneShot
by ladyylazarus
Summary: "No!" Lily cried, truly dismayed. For in the compartment in front of her stood four fifth year boys. And one, with tousled black hair and a mischievous smile, was holding aloft a gleaming gold and scarlet Gryffindor prefect's badge. - OneShot starring Lily and the Marauders. R&R :)


_**All's Fair In Love and War**_

Lily, Alice, and Hypatia made their way through the crowded car, trying to find an empty compartment. Hypatia and Alice were in a lively discussion about the all-witch quidditch team, the Holy-Head Harpies, who were apparently recruiting new players in the spring. Lily listened with limited enthusiasm about the loss of two of the team's best players.

"They're never going to find a better keeper than Persephone. She just beat Schaber's record! Can you believe it? 1500 blocks! And Myra, well, no one can touch her. She's hardly missed a shot in three years!" Hypatia went on excitedly. "She's the fastest thing flying…"

Lily lost track of the conversation, wondering whether she had to bring all of her belongings to the prefects' compartment or simply show up to receive her orders. She looked at each compartment absentmindedly as they passed, hoping to find one empty. Her bag really was very heavy. She couldn't remember exactly what she had packed that made it so tedious to carry. Maybe it was _Magical Hieroglyphs and Logograms_, one of her required textbooks for Ancient Runes. Idly, she glanced into another compartment and froze.

"And I hear Carys fancies she'll be able to replace Myra. She's so full of herself. I can't believe –

"No!" Lily cried, truly dismayed. Her friends stopped and looked back at her.  
>"What's –<br>But Alice's question died in her throat as she realized where Lily was staring.

In the compartment in front of them stood four fifth year boys. And one, with tousled black hair and a mischievous smile, was holding aloft a gleaming gold and scarlet Gryffindor prefect's badge.

...

"Let me get a look at it again," said James, snickering. "Just to make sure it hasn't vanished."  
>Sirius handed it to him, winking. "Careful, it might disintegrate, you being such a menace to the wizarding community."<p>

"Well you touched it. I think I'll be fine." James held the badge aloft as though it were a sacred relic. "One of our own: a prefect." He grinned wickedly. "Things are going to be loads easier now that we've got some real power on our side."  
>Remus reached out for it, "James, I don't –<p>

"No!" All four spun to see Lily Evans gaping at them, aghast. Remus hastily grabbed the prefect's badge and went to the compartment door.

"Hi Lily." He smiled, attempting to block the entrance. Things never turned out well for anybody when Lily and James were in close proximity. "Congratulations!" He continued hastily, seeing the matching badge pinned to her rucksack. "Always knew you'd be made prefect. No one else for it, really."

She stared past him at James, bewildered. "But – he can't be –  
>Remus, bemused, was so startled when he realized what she meant he let out an incredulous snort. Lily glared at him. "No!" He laughed. "Oh no, he's not a prefect, I am!" He grinned, holding up the badge.<p>

Lily's face adopted a look of only mild distaste as Remus continued to chuckle. "Blimey, no one in their right mind would make James a prefect." He clapped her on the shoulder. James and Sirius looked at each other, eyebrows raised.

"Yes, well, I suppose you're right." She scowled once more at James, then turned to leave. "See you at the feast Remus."

She was just starting to walk back to join her friends when James said, rather loudly, to Sirius, "Would it have been that unbearable, working with me? Patrolling all those empty corridors together, late at night," he paused significantly, "alone –AARGH!"

James had been flung into the window and now lay sprawled in a breathless heap on the compartment floor. Remus saw Lily stow her wand in the pocket of her jumper.

She knelt beside him. "You had better watch your step, Potter." She hissed, her cheeks pink. "If you put one toe out of line I'll give you a month's worth of detentions sorting flobberworms and gathering venomous tentacula pods for Professor Slughorn. I will also put in a word for you with McGonagall and have you suspended from the quidditch team until I deem you sufficiently reformed." She glared at him. "Do we understand each other?"

He lifted his head from the floor and smiled winsomely. "You're incredible when you're all fiery, Evans. Your eyes – AHH!" James yelped, for the second time in as many minutes, as another jinx hit him squarely between the eyes.

"Don't forget it." Lily growled and stalked from the compartment, tailed by her friends.

Sirius helped James off the floor. "Better luck next time, mate." He said, chuckling. "But you may want to change your strategy. You're never going to get her at this rate."

"Why is it that whenever the two of us are together I always end up getting hexed? Last time it was hives, and before that I had hair growing out of my ears for a week, remember?" He looked indignant.

"Next time she'll probably spell 'pompous git' across your face in boils; make the fact a bit more obvious." Sirius snorted, earning him a hard shove.

Remus smirked. "I suppose she thinks it improves your look." Sirius hooted with mirth. "No, really," He continued. "You know you're popular with girls–  
>"Obviously there's one exception," interrupted Sirius, dodging James' fist.<br>"- so I think she finds it easier to deal with you when you look like an idiot rather than when you're acting normal." Remus concluded.

James raised an eyebrow. "Then I'm not going to have much luck, am I?" He grumbled. "Might as well give up now."

But Remus and James both knew he wouldn't be giving up any time soon.

* * *

><p><strong>NOTE:<strong> So what did you think? Review please :)

-Mel


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